Saturday, July 10, 2010

Desert island doctors

So the results are in!  Seventeen of you good folks voted in my recent poll, "If you were stranded on a desert island, what kind of doctor would you like to be with?"  Correction: seventeen votes were cast.  I know that some of you can't resist monkeying with my polls, but I persevere nevertheless.  I am so selfless.

Anyway, only one person voted for "Orthopod".  I suppose it's possible that you thought I meant "Arthropod", but in any case it's clear that orthopods aren't exactly the most popular people around.  Having said that, I met a very pleasant orthopod just last week.  He was handsome in an eerily unrealistic way that made me wonder if he was just an actor pretending to be an orthopod.  That might explain why he was so pleasant.

Two people voted for "Obstetrician".  I'm guessing that one of you is pregnant and the other one is married to an obstetrician and was hoping to curry favour with them.  Well I have seen straight through you buddy.

Three people voted for "Psychiatrist", which I think was wise.  It would get pretty boring on a desert island and in my experience psychiatrists are the best story tellers.

Four people voted for "GP", which again I think was wise of you.  General practitioners are usually pretty hefty thanks to all those free lunches from the drug reps.  When you run out of coconuts on the island, just knock the GP on the head and there'll be a good month worth of eating on them.

But the clear winner was "Anaesthetist" with seven votes.  I suspect that most of those votes were cast by medical students, who have a noted soft spot for anaesthetists because it's the anaesthetist who tries hard to be nice to students in the operating theatre, chatting away to us and giving us the odd job to do while the surgeons either ignore us completely or deliberately try to humiliate us.  Unless the surgeon is just an actor pretending to be a surgeon.

If anybody wants to explain their vote differently, feel free!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I was really just hoping that the anaesthetist would be carrying a lot of drugs.

PTR said...

Ah, because you have a chronic muscle spasm! A wise choice.